An Intention to Change

Staying in touch is not something I do and when a chapter of my life ends, the people associated with that chapter drift away. University was like that for me, but one of my classmates has tracked me down and asked to meet with me while passing through Calgary on a holiday. Our class was small, around twenty people and two I considered my friends; Gene was one of them. We met for breakfast and had a three hour talk, catching up and then comparing notes on our current life and interests.
We were rebels during University and cared nothing for religion but both of us have found spirituality over the four decades since graduating, each in his own way addressing the emptiness within that is a natural consequence of an existence devoid of Divinity. Gene has become a devout Christian and is a member of a vibrant and growing non-denominational church in Winnipeg where he lives. He reads his Bible daily and also listens to a weekday broadcast by a woman preacher from St. Louis in the United States.
Gene’s brand of Christianity is primarily love based and it has served him well. In University, he was more interested in being remembered than he was in being liked and this gave him a cocky almost arrogant edge. Underneath it all was the kind and considerate man he has become, but this was mostly covered over back in the day. I could see a difference in Gene, both in terms of how he related to me and in terms of how he related to others with a kindness and a consideration that was not there forty years ago.
He expressed an interest in my current views and listened with interest, tying many things back to his own beliefs and mostly we got along well. On one occasion we entered into dysfunction and it was because of me, not because of Gene. Part of my story was how I had returned to Christianity in the early stages of becoming spiritual and how I had left because the Christian view of God was so different from my personal experience. I brought up what I consider an extreme example, where the Biblical God recommends genocide; something the God of my experience would not consider.
Gene began to express his views that such a course of action was entirely consistent as a way of stamping out evil and we found ourselves far apart in this segment of our conversation. Mostly we used dialogue where each of us expressed our views in turn and the other simply noted areas of disagreement, but when Gene began defending genocide I lost it and twice truncated his segments with vehemence unbecoming of dialogue and the person I know myself to be. To his credit, Gene did not enter into the dysfunction, just dropped the subject and we returned to other matters of mutual interest.
Shortly after all of this, I introduced Gene to my Daughter and she was part of the last half hour or so of our conversation. We later went grocery shopping and I told her about my vehemence during that earlier segment of our conversation. ‘Not surprising’ was her response. ‘How so?’ I enquired. ‘I have seen you do this many times when someone disagrees with you.’
I checked this out and she was right. I also checked out my truth about acting in this way and found several down sides and no upside. I had been thinking that I was guided to do so and thus acted out of character as a service to Gene, but this seemed an ego based excuse rather than grounded in truth. Last but not least, it was not the way I choose to act. Right then and there, I took the intention to change this behaviour and will no longer indulge in vehemence. It is now in writing and the change is underway. I may also apologize to Gene.
Freedom for humanity…


About freedom4humanity

Serving Humanity with information about the Divine process of Ascension.
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2 Responses to An Intention to Change

  1. Olivia says:

    Hey John! Just writing to let you know I am still reading your blog. Good to see yet another good thing has happened to you!

  2. Thanks Olivia. Nice to hear from you again.

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