Reliving Some Lessons

The best teacher I ever had was my second wife, Lynn. Two important lessons she taught me were combined in a dream this morning along with the dominant emotion I felt at the time, a deep seated anger that I call soul level anger. In living, the lessons were sequentially but in the dream, they were learned together.
In the dream I ask Lynn to be a willing participant in changing our relationship and she refuses. I am deeply angry and communicate that I accept her decision and will travel the path of change alone and unaided but that I will leave when the change is complete.
Aside from timing issues all of these things took place including the predominant emotion of deep seated anger. I do not know if my decision to leave was precipitated by Lynn’s refusal to be a willing participant in the changes we underwent and in looking back, it at first seemed as though that decision was already made and then I think a bit more and it seems possible that at a subconscious level below my awareness, this is exactly what occurred.
In this way of looking at things, the event took place in 2005. I was by then fully dedicated to my spiritual path and to learning the lessons of my path and I approached Lynn with my request that she be a willing participant in shifting our relationship. I knew the relationship as it was currently structured was not suitable for the path I was to travel and thus the request. Lynn refused my request and I remember being accepting of her choice but at the same time deeply angry. She never explained herself; perhaps she could not because she was not in touch with her own soul level reasons; or perhaps she wanted the relationship to stay as it was out of homeostasis or fear.
Years earlier in the late 1990’s I had learned that it only took one to change. In other words Lynn could not hold me hostage by her refusal to participate so I knew I could walk my chosen path while living in this relationship with or without Lynn’s willing participation. That was the path I took and about a year later began attending meditation retreats while Lynn carried on life as usual. In early 2007 about two years after this germinating event, I surrendered my marriage to Divinity and it was not given back to me. Within hours of the choice to surrender it, to give it back to Divinity from whence it had come twenty years earlier; I knew it was to end as walking our diverging paths together would not serve either of us in the long term.
I did not know how to tell Lynn and procrastinated for three or four weeks. Then came galvanizing information. I went to a weekend retreat and Lynn visited family. When we reunited, she told me of an experience she had the night before of being paralyzed with a bright light in front of her face. Something broke free within her and passed so she could move again, but the light remained for several hours before dimming into memory. ‘Could this have been a spiritual experience?’ I asked, but for Lynn it contained nothing but terror and we let the matter drop. The next morning I ‘knew’ this was a message for us both. If we continued to stay together, she would be taken from me.
I told Lynn of my decision to leave and fully dedicate myself to my spiritual path in fifteen months time. This was the guidance given me along with the information that we could safely remain together until that time should she so choose. I gave this decision to Lynn and she chose to continue our life together for those remaining fifteen months. Our soul contract was still alive, very much alive, and the best teacher I ever had continued to teach me lessons right up until the day we parted.
Thank you, Lynn. Thank you. May your life be blessed.
Freedom for humanity….

About freedom4humanity

Serving Humanity with information about the Divine process of Ascension.
This entry was posted in Experiences, Metaphysics, Mission. Bookmark the permalink.

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