New Year’s was in many ways a repeat of the lesson I learned over Christmas. Essentially the lesson is that agendas based on ‘Eat, Drink and be Merry’ do not do it for me anymore. This agenda takes me out of my power and is a purposeless detour leading away from what I am to focus on and manifest in this stage of my life.
The ‘Drink’ part of this is especially problematic because alcohol leaves a residual effect that carries over into the next several hours after I have left the merriment and returned to a base of my own design. I could of course choose not to drink alcohol while in these situations, sticking to Eat and be Merry and that would certainly help but is unattractive and it feels as though I am to explore other options.
One that works for my youngest daughter is to stay away, to decline the invitation. She has a one year old child and this choice is due to these obligations and her dedication to being a ‘good mother’ by her own particular definition. Let’s call this the stay away option.
Another option is what I do at the summer gathering. There I stay in character which really means I stay authentic and there are a number of people, young adults mostly, who are interested in my agenda and these episodes sustain me. I also make time for solitude and the gathering is fun. We will call this the stay authentic option.
In the latest situation, my landlord daughter and I ate breakfast together and I was able to give her some well received feedback about her current love interest and factors at work within the relationship after observing them together at the New Year’s Eve gathering. That was an example of remaining authentic and following my guidance and would not have occurred had I chosen the stay away option.
Another option is to grin and bear it. At many of these smaller gatherings, the remain authentic option is not available since all of those present are familiar with the agenda of my authentic self and many are offended by the premise that major shifts are underway. Those few who share my world view are there for the merriment and for the games. Games tend to be an important part of most of my family gatherings as my family is a games playing family. I respect this agenda and grin and bear it.
The next question is how important is it that I learn the lessons contained within this and select appropriate options for these family gatherings. To date I have been largely using the grin and bear it option unless of course the remain authentic option presents itself. Mostly though, it has been drink in order to grin and bear it; and then suffer a repositioning period on the other end such as today.
Is that kind of approach going to be enough to get the job done? Drinking seems the only thing at issue here. If I attended as a teetotaller there would be no issue what so ever. I would simply grin and bear it while otherwise going about my business and leaving when appropriate. At Christmas time, I drank too much on one occasion and had a mild hangover the next day, otherwise the drinking has been moderate, including New Year’s Eve and there has been no hangover. My body and my aura is affected by drink in ways that I previously did not experience and I am left wondering if drinking is something that should be shelved for the time being.
Let me run the entire holidays without drinking. How does that feel? What I would need is a quiet room where I could go when it all seemed too much and meditate or otherwise make my adjustments. That was in fact available in both locations and by increments the adjustment between a solitary dedication to my agenda and eat and be merry in the grin and bear it mode would take place. I would not have played in the cards tournament the first night but that works too. I am not responsible for entertaining the rest or for making the event a ‘success’. I am responsible for my well being and for my ongoing level of dedication to walking my path. Drinking, even in moderation is not honouring my path or walking the walk.
Okay. It seems I am to quit drinking, at least until my gift is manifest.
Hmmm, not what I expected when I began writing this, but I accept.
Freedom for humanity…
Since writing this over two years ago, my total alcohol consumption has been two glasses of champagne. It has been wonderful!