I posted a letter to my family based on yesterday’s blog and got some feedback that I had inadequately touched on the aspect of secrecy and silence. This feedback was correct and I added this post today, edited for confidentiality:
It has been pointed out to me that my letter could be taken to condone secrecy and silence. I can understand that perception as it is not something I directly addressed, however; that could not be further from my truth. I believe all matters are best served by openness and disclosure. In this case, my sister informed Mum and each chose to keep it a secret from the other branches of the family. I can understand the motivation behind that approach but I do not agree with it. I believe we each would be best served by owning the truth and being able to express our truth accordingly. That serves everyone, including the young man convicted of child pornography charges. Let’s give him the fictitious name of Stephen. It is secrecy and silence that allowed Stephen to become a part of a dangerous subculture that sees children as sex objects and sex toy with no intrinsic worth of their own. The police ended that secrecy and silence for Stephen and for his family. That same responsibility then falls to his family to end that secrecy and silence for the larger family and so on and so forth.
By ending secrecy and silence we let the light in and positive change results. Yes, there can be some rough spots in the process and these may be uncomfortable for some, including Stephen, but the end result is a movement toward light, toward the free and open sharing of information, and for the loving and compassionate protection of all. None of us, and I include Stephen, want to see children abused. None of us want to create situations where Stephen is tempted to treat a child, any child, as other than what they are; a person, a human being, with the same rights and privileges as anyone else. We will each keep our eye on Stephen and avoid situations where children are at risk. That serves everyone, including Stephen.
As an example of transparency, I have shared all of this information with each of my kids and have encouraged each of them to share as they deem appropriate.
We have a large family, Mum has seven children, twenty six grandchildren, thirty six great grandchildren and three great great grandchildren and of course more are on the way including one of my daughters, pregnant for the first time. This family began with a very large secret as my father sexually abused the third of his five daughters. The secret was outed by the daughter more than a decade after the abuse ended and the family learned a great deal in that outing and in the healing work that followed.
How many more secrets we have accumulated over the past few decades I cannot say, but I can say one thing. There are no secrets in my branch of the family, at least none that have come into my awareness. When a secret comes into my awareness, I make it public and inform those affected. Since beginning to write the blog, I have extended this policy to the blog and things others would keep secret are written up and become public information.
Confidentiality is respected when requested, so names are not used or fictitious names are invented, but my policy of transparency is given the highest priority. That means no one can tell me something and expect me to keep it a secret. That simply will not happen. Once in my field, it is subject to the same criteria as anything else and if chosen as the subject of a blog, it will be written about and published. I am not in charge of this process; it is a guided process and part of the unseen world which I honor.
This policy of transparency and disclosure of information has many benefits, some are outlined above. Another is exclusion from gossip. No one gossips with me and if someone asks for me to keep a secret I simply decline and they are then free to choose to either keep the secret to themselves or tell me knowing I will tell others if so inclined; respecting their confidentiality of course.
I did not choose transparency, it chose me. Secrets and silence are commonplace in duality but disappear as we move into oneness and the higher dimensions. Having practiced transparency and disclosure for many years, I can say from experience they are well worth the effort with many benefits and no downside of which I am aware.
Freedom for humanity…